20. Horo (Spice and Wolf)

Seiyuu: Ami Koshimizu

Kicking off this Top 20 list is Horo, the self-proclaimed Wise Wolf, from Spice and Wolf. I usually don’t go for the animal girls due to furry implications, but I’ll make an exception for Horo. She’s a smart, feisty firecracker with a vulnerable side, and being able to transform into an ferocious giant Wolf God helps in a pinch. One minute she’s a cute girl minding her own business, then the next she’s a giant monster ready to kick your ass! That’s actually not too far off from real girls except for the wolf transformation bit. But I digress… She also gets props for making an anime centered around feudal economics interesting. lolwut?

19. Stocking (Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt)

Seiyuu: Mariya Ise

Stocking’s place on this list is an oddity as she’s the antithesis of anime girls I tend to like. Crude, rude and just plain gross, Stocking is a gothy fallen angel obsessed with all things sweet while hardly being sweet herself. What’s her appeal then? It’s her flagship trademark for which she’s named, the almighty thigh-high stockings! A-plus level Stockings! A-plus level Zettai Ryouiki! C-minus level Personality! That is Stocking in a nutshell.

18. Rei Ayanami (Neon Genesis Evangelion)

Seiyuu: Megumi Hayashibara

Rei is here mostly for posterity’s sake, because this list needs at least one classic character on it. That’s not to say I dislike her or anything, otherwise she wouldn’t be here. When I first watched NGE more than a decade ago (damn) I took an immediate liking to the enigmatic girl with blue hair. Of course this was before watching the entire show and finding out how messed up it and all the characters were, but that’s a different matter.

To the unobserved fan, Rei lacks personality and is boring, but quiet characters express themselves with body language and actions, both of which speak louder than words. Once you learn to observe their actions, quiet girls have plenty to say without ever saying a word. Trends change and certain characters will have their fifteen minutes of fame. While Rei’s place on this list may seem fairly low, she’ll always have a guaranteed spot here since she’s a timeless character.

There’s also the Giant Naked Rei thing too. Think about that the next time you’re fapping.

17. Nagisa Furukawa (Clannad)

Seiyuu: Mai Nakahara

There’s a lot of unjust Nagisa hate among the Clannad fandom, mostly because she’s the main heroine in place of more “interesting” characters like Tomoyo and Kyou. Bah to them, because Nagisa’s plenty interesting without having to be a Mary Sue (Tomoyo) or tsundere (Kyou).

It’s odd for the Nagisa haters to hate on Nagisa but still like Clannad, because Nagisa is the focal point of the overarching story whether you like it or not. She’s just too damn cute with that catchy Dango song too.

16. Natsuki Kuga (Mai-HiME)

Seiyuu: Saeko Chiba

Girls with guns will be a recurring theme on this list, and Natsuki’s an oldie but a goodie. She may have fallen from the lofty heights of the Top 10, but at least she’s still around right? Natsuki plays the role of beautiful yet aloof badass perfectly even though it’s quite to the contrary of her real personality. Watch the series for the details as there would be sizable plot spoilers, and I don’t feel like writing it all either. There’s much more to her than the motorcycle riding babe with the skintight suit and twin pistols, but that first impression is how I breast best remember her.

15. Kagami and Tsukasa Hiiragi (Lucky Star)

Seiyuu: Emiri Kato, Kaori Fukuhara

Is it cheating to put two girls in the same spot and unofficially make this a Top 21 list? I listed Kagami alone on my previous list, and while she’s all well and good on her own, it doesn’t feel right to list her without Tsukasa as well. Their personalities really come out most when they’re with each other. You can make a case for the Kagami-Konata pair, but the appeal there is based more on contrast whereas Kagami-Tsukasa dynamic is complimentary. The two sisters both have their own separate appeal with Kagami as the level-headed sister and Tsukasa as the ditz, but their chemistry together is what makes the pairing special.

14. Yui Hirasawa (K-ON!)

Seiyuu: Aki Toyosaki

Is it a double standard to list Kagami-Tsukasa and not Yui-Ui together? Perhaps a bit. My reasoning is Ui just isn’t that interesting. Yui works well solo and with everyone else in the show including Ui. In Lucky Star, Tsukasa can work solo and has good chemistry with the rest of her respective cast as well. Ui on her own is just sort of… There. Ui is just so blank slate that the K-ON fandom pretty much took it upon themselves to give her a secret yandere personality to make up for the deficit, like so.

Now after going off on that tangent it’s time to talk about Yui. She’s awesome moeblob sauce. I guess that’s it. Hooray tangents!

13. Akiha Tohno (Tsukihime)

Seiyuu: Shizuka Itou (anime), Hitomi (Melty Blood)

Elegant, modest and refined, Akiha is a true ojousama without being a snob like the archetype is typically known. She’s also a bit of a brocon… … … Okay fine. She’s a HUGE closet brocon, but it’s part of her charm and there’s a good reason for it. No spoilers here folks, so go play the Tsukihime VN or read the manga.

Actually now that I really think of it, Akiha’s place on this list is suspect since she’s more prominent in games than anime. Tsukihime did get a sole anime, but all things considered, it was a badly butchered mess. On its own it wasn’t too bad I guess, but the Tsukihime VN deserved so much better. It’s no wonder the Tsukihime anime is generally viewed with disdain by the Type-Moon fanbase. If the anime had one good point though, it was the absolutely stellar soundtrack. The music is worth listening to on its own for the sake of just being good.

I got distracted again didn’t I? Well despite how poor the Tsukihime anime was handled, Akiha is still technically an anime character and gets a spot.

12. Shana (Shakugan no Shana)

Seiyuu: Rie Kugimiya

It seems fitting to list my two girls with black-to-red hair back to back, even if they are completely different on every fundamental level. You can say Shana is a textbook Type A Tsundere with extra emphasis on the tsun. When you conjure thoughts of Shana (hopefully not too dirty), the first thing that comes to mind is her famous Urusai x3 catchphrase. So what makes her special? Mostly the Rie Kugimiya factor. If it was any other seiyuu I’d probably pass on Shana, but Kugimiya is the spark that makes Shana memorable. It’s unusual that I don’t really care for Kugimiya’s other tsundere roles though…

11. Ein (Phantom: Requiem for the Phantom)

Seiyuu: Ayahi Takagaki

Anyone that knows me well knows I have a thing for girls with guns. It’s just a classic winning combination like peanut butter and jam. The amnesiac Ein might be as stoic as they come, but who needs to talk when you can let your gun do all the talking for you? She’s a killer combination of deadly and cute. Like I say with all quiet characters, Ein does most of her talking with actions, and what she does isn’t nice.

For the record, she’s not actually a maid. There weren’t many good source pictures to draw from, so I ended up going with this one.

I’m horribly out of the loop when it comes to VN news, but I just found out about the Kanon English patch yesterday. Say what you will about my slowpokeness. It’s okay. So after squealing like a little girl at a Jonas Brothers concert for five minutes, I finally got around to installing a… dubious copy of Kanon that’s been sitting on my HD for ages, along with the requisite voice and English patches.

Upon finally playing the game I was utterly mesmerized and blew a good three hours in the first sitting without realizing it… And this is why I don’t play VNs despite loving them so much — They’re too damn addicting. Yes, they’re even more addicting than jelly beans. I swore off VNs for the better part of two years, but maybe it’s something I can’t escape from. A great VN draws you in and doesn’t let go for a second. It makes you laugh, cry, and most importantly identify with its characters on a more intimate level since VNs are an interactive experience as opposed to passively watching an anime. Perhaps non-VN players will get the wrong impression when I say “intimate”, but there isn’t a better way to describe the feeling. Dictating the story and choosing your path (and girl) makes the experience much more personal compared to an anime.

Anyway that’s enough ranting. If it seems like I’m around even less than usual, you can chalk that up to alternatively crying and fapping to this spectacular VN. I already decided I’m going down the Nayuki path, hence the Nayuki screenshot. Screw the Taiyaki Thief, Meat Bun Fanatic, Demon Hunter and Dying Girl. I’ve got Cousin Lovin’ Strawberry Jam!

Go bother Emmy Award winning co-author Meultima in the meantime. I heard he’s currently playing a VN of his own, some nonsense about Umineko Wafers and Doki Doki Strike Witches or something. I’m not privy to all the details, but that’s what I surmised from spying on him from the bushes outside. By the way, I love what you’ve done with the place dude.

PS: I do plan to buy a legit copy of Kanon. The epic (and discontinued) Key Memorial Box would be awesome, but settling for a standalone copy isn’t so bad.

I’m aware Ali Project existed long before this song was released, and that they even had theme songs in prior shows, but this was the song that got their name out there. “Copperia no Hitsugi” was the breakout single that brought Ali Project out of obscurity into the mainstream fold. Most of you out there are probably much more familiar with Ali Project through the Rozen Maiden and Code Geass franchises, and either loved or hated their themes. There isn’t a band doing anime themes that’s more polarizing than Ali Project, as there isn’t much middle ground between the camps that love and hate them. For better or worse, the second you hear their distinct musical style, you automatically know it’s Ali Project.

Maybe it’s just burn out from Ali Project overexposure these days. Just because a studio can use Ali Project due to their name recognition doesn’t mean it should happen. In their favor, their work in Rozen Maiden, Princess Resurrection and even .hack//Roots actually fit the motif of the series. Though oftentimes when they aren’t working on a dark or Gothic show, the songs feel horribly out of place, as is the case with Code Geass and Sora Kake Girl. You could say I’ve become disenchanted with their music, but a part of me still likes Ali Project too. It’s not like I’m going to go add all their new songs to my playlist and listen to them on repeat, but I do sit through their OPs and EDs, and their annoyingly catchy songs consequently get stuck in my head.

Three of their most recent songs, “Rara Eve Shinseiki” (Sora Kake Girl OP1) “Jigoku no Mon” (Phantom ED1) and “Senritsu no Kodomotachi” (Phantom OP2) are admittedly meh… But they’re still somewhat catchy despite the meh-ness. When Sora Kake Girl was airing I did find myself humming the opening tune without realizing it, cursing Ali Project all the while. Likewise, Phantom’s first ending was somewhat decent, with the visuals having a big part in making it memorable. Phantom’s second opening on the other hand is just plain grating on the ears, but is still sorta catchy in a weird masochistic way.

Despite the sensationalist title and Ali Project ragging, I don’t think they’re bad per se. If they were outright awful they wouldn’t continue to get work, but the fact is the band hasn’t changed much if at all over the years, and their style has fallen into a rut. The Ali Project from eight years ago is more or less the same Ali Project as today, and by strictly adhering to a singular style have become stale as a result. Their music is still distinguishable from the norm, but their songs are all more or less interchangeable with each other. Lyrics aside, you could replace a Rozen Maiden OP with just about any other theme they’ve done and you wouldn’t know the difference.

Overall I neither like nor hate Ali Project as they are now. I do admit their songs are still pretty catchy, but they desperately need to revamp their style because of how stale they’ve become. You actually could interpret not needing to change a sign of success as well since they haven’t needed to change to remain successful, but for a band like Ali Project that made its name through innovation, change would be a very, very good thing and make them relevant again to me. Now for your listening perusal, here’s a selection of TV size songs. For further shits and giggles, play them all at once for the ultimate ear bleeding mashup.

I was nosing through the university video library the other day and was pleasantly surprised to find they have a healthy collection of anime, including a few titles I hadn’t seen. A size-able chunk of these shows I knew immediately, old hat favourites like Ranma 1/2, Patlabor, Evangelion, GitS, Rurouni Kenshin. But then a thought occurred to me: If I had never seen an anime before, how would I begin to approach this cartoon menagerie?

Well, at first glance they’ll be captivated by the box art. It’s very colourful, almost psychedelic—reds, blues, greens, robots, girls, swords, guns, big hair, spaceships, robots—that’s enough to reel them in for a closer look but beyond that is a world of deceptive titles and juxtaposed images. Could you imagine what they’d think seeing the title The Super Dimension Fortress Macross: Do You Remember Love?

So back to my question, what would be a good show to introduce someone to anime? In fact that’s a question that eventually pops up when you find yourself ready to share your interests with your significant other. Obviously you don’t want to freak them out or bore them to death or have her/him think you’re weird. You want something that would appeal and interest them, not alienate.

Would you call it a responsibility to choose the right show for somebody? Personally, I’d offer up Tenchi Muyo! Probably because it was the first series I ever bought and was also the first that really opened my eyes to how an impossibly convoluted mash-up of action-adventure-comedy- romance-science fiction-drama managed to function so seamlessly. It was charming in its madness.  Although, perhaps it’s too maddening for its charm (as later dreaded instalment prove). Choosing the right show for the right person is certainly not a simple task, but when you get it right you can see how much it was worth it. About a year ago around Christmas time, I took the time out for my two cousins (ages 6 and and put them in front of the set to watch Steamboy. They didn’t have the same love for Naruto and Pokemon after that.

So, to you fine connoisseurs, which show (movie or series) do you think would make for a great introductory?

I don’t really have a witty introduction for this rant, but here’s what I have to say about the Valkyria Chronicles anime. It’s kind of long-ish though, so you’ve been warned.

The Good:

One of the few things the anime has over the game is greater depth of characterization, and all the major characters are fleshed out significantly more than their game counterparts, though this applies predominantly to Faldio as he’s taken a significant role in the anime compared to the game where he was a seldom seen, recurring character that initiated a few plot points as needed. Compared to the original game, Faldio’s anime counterpart is very relevant to the story, and his presence actually adds some much needed drama to the otherwise boring and predictable Welkin-Alicia relationship. All love stories worth their salt are obligated to include a love triangle or two to keep things fresh.

Faldio’s greater role in the anime also sets him up much better for his inevitable falling out with Welkin and Alicia later in the story, because we the audience actually get adequate time to know and identify with him, learn his motivations, what makes him tick. The anime has actually set up his fall as the tragic hero perfectly.

Alicia, and to a lesser extent, the other members of Squad 7 also benefitted from the anime. Originally, Alicia didn’t have much personality to speak of aside from being a Mary Sue heroine, but the anime makes her a much more believable character. Sure some fans will cry foul for consequently turning her into a tsundere, but she became much more vibrant in the anime and shows a certain spark to her personality that was missing in the game, partly due to the greater role of Faldio who knows how to push all her buttons. And how can you not love the full range of her priceless expressions? The Alicia facefault is worth the price of admission.

Even the Imperials have been humanized much more from the big generals all the way down to the grunts. Jaeger is actually a pretty interesting guy, and seeing him get a boost in screen time has made him more than just some enemy general you fight a couple times in the game. Selvaria is still little more than Maximillian’s puppet, but at least she has more personality than “Hay guyz I’m a Valkyria and I’m gonna tear you a new one lolol”. It’s also kind of nice to see the rank and file soldiers actually have faces now, because it reminds us that although they’re the enemy they’re still humans… Though to be fair the game probably had to dehumanize the enemy soldiers for morality issues since you end up shooting a lot of them, mostly in the head.

The inclusion of the anime exclusive, Ramal, adds some depth to Isara and gives an otherwise shafted character a much needed love interest that was missing from the game… Some among us may have shipped Welkin-Isara (I know I sure did), but there was no way that would ever feasibly happen in such a mainstream game… Ramal started off as Faldio’s annoying sidekick, but I’ve grown to like the guy lately, partly because he’s interesting and partly because Isara needs a love interest while Welkin is off being an idiot. Speaking of which…

The Bad:

I lauded the script for making Faldio a relevant character, but at what expense? There’s almost been too much Faldio at Welkin’s expense. It’s not completely his fault for making Welkin look like a friggin moron, but Faldio’s competence on the battlefields of both war and love makes the real protagonist look like an ignoramus. While Welkin’s personality is more or less intact, as he is supposed to be oblivious to social interactions, at least he was an awesome strategist. Faldio has basically usurped Welkin’s original role in the story as the brilliant (if unorthodox) strategist that wins against stacked odds, and he’s sweeping Alicia off her feet while Welkin stands on the sideline being a doofus.

By now we should all know Welkin-Alicia is the canon relationship, but it’s hard not to make the real relationship look contrived with Faldio’s overbearing hand in the love triangle. Any way I look at it, Faldio is such a front runner that having Alicia settle for Welkin looks like settling for second place.

My other major nitpick, and this is a big one, is that all the battles have been lackluster and just plain missing. Epic battles were a staple of the game. Welkin and company would run through the streets of abandoned towns and vast fields engaging in guerilla warfare with ruthless Imperial troops. The Edelweiss would advance as scouts, shock troopers and engineers followed suit taking care to stay out of the enemy’s line of fire. Meanwhile the snipers would find a perch, waiting for the perfect headshot to present itself. None of that has been present in the anime, which has liberally skipped some of the game’s best battles. This is a show about war, so where’s the fighting? I didn’t expect the VC anime to be totally action packed, but the total lack of action is just ridiculous.

The anime has been sorely missing two of the game’s biggest symbols, the Edelweiss, and by association the Lion’s Paw, are the symbols of Squad 7 — one a resilient tank epitomizing Gallia’s sole hope against the vastly superior Empire, and the Lion’s Paw a resilient flower that overcomes adversity to bloom in even the harshest of conditions.

A lesser nitpick is how much the Squad 7 generics like Edy, Susie and Marina have been shafted. I never expected them to be more than minor characters, but they desperately need just a little more screen time since they’re actually quite engaging when they do get to talk, and by giving them lines the squad feels like it’s more than just Welkin, Alicia, Largo, Rosie, and a bunch of expendable background characters to fill out the roster. I want to see more of Edy’s one sided rivalry with Rosie, more Jann being a complete fruit, more Homer being a hilarious masochist, and moar Marina Wulfstan being a friggin awesome sniper. These guys are interesting, and they need more lines. It’s looking increasingly unlikely we’ll see the Edy Detachment at this rate.

I think I covered the things I’ve liked and disliked about the VC anime. Unlike most of the people watching it, I don’t think it outright sucks, but it has been a letdown in certain areas. The characterization is much improved at the expense of some story aspects here and there. The small liberties with the story I can live with like Alicia getting kidnapped along with Princess Cordelia. It didn’t happen in the game but it’s fine. I’m not the kind of guy that complains about lack of action, like when shounen have to insert story episodes between fights to set up the plot, but the VC anime’s disparate story/action ratio is alarming. This little rant ended up being far longer than originally intended, so let’s end it here.

tl;dr: VC anime needs more action and more Squad 7 side character development. Maybe some more jokes about Selvaria’s huge tracts of land too. Yeah! I want that too.

This is probably something anime fans don’t ask themselves too often, but why do we like anime? I know I obviously like anime since I watch it and have an animu blog, but things get murky when trying to explain why I like it. The first response would be that it entertains me, but that’s still a pretty vague answer.

So going further, what makes anime entertaining then? I pondered this for a bit and then pondered it some more. After much pondering, I still can’t give a clearly defined answer. I feel the same way about video games to an extent, but I can more easily pinpoint two big focal points of good games — Story and gameplay. With some exceptions, good games have one or the other, and great games have both. Lesser factors like characters, music and voice work are important too, but story and gameplay take precedence in games.

Anime obviously doesn’t have gameplay since it’s a passive experience, so that leaves story to carry the weight for good anime, leaving other factors like characters, animation, music and voice work to pick up the slack. A lot of great anime rely on epic, sometimes convoluted story lines to carry the show, but story often isn’t everything. Several anime don’t even have a story in the proper sense of the word. You probably know what particular genre I’m getting at — The Slice of life. Slice of life shows do technically have a story as they do follow a series of events revolving more around small-scale characterization and social interactions, but SoLs are no less enjoyable than the more traditionally “story” oriented anime out there.

That kind of flushes my story thesis down the drain when it comes to anime. So after all this ranting, I still can’t explain why I like anime. Story is obviously important, but not all anime have a “story”. Characters are a close second in importance. A likable cast helps a show immensely, but they still need the story to dictate what they do, otherwise they would just sit around having tea and crackers. So good anime focus on story and characters. Everything after that is gravy.

All said, this rant got way off track from its original purpose. Even after all this conjecture I still can’t say why I really like anime, except that it’s simply enjoyable and there’s a lot of variety to suit lots of tastes. A groundbreaking story isn’t truly essential to liking an anime, so it’s very arguable that characters are really the most important component of an anime. Furthermore, an anime doesn’t even have to be “good” to be entertaining, as I’m often entertained by shows that are sheer crap. Thus, this article/rant was just me blowing hot air and wasting your time. That’s a good five minutes of your life you’ll never have back. Just as planned.

That’s never really a question you ever think to ask yourself. It’s perfectly normal to assume the ride will last forever, and it does until . . . Well, I’m not quite sure which show it was, but I just remember the ride ending.

“I’m done.”

Call it an awakening or a revelation, even an epiphany. Really, all I knew was I hit wall and just burnt out. Though what struck me was I didn’t know why it happened.

Now, I’ll tell ya, anime was good – heck! It was like a drug I didn’t wanna quit! Every episode was a rush and as soon as it was over I loaded up another hit. My hard-drive was devoted to anime; stills, clips, sound bites, doujin, wallpaper, desktop themes. If it was anime or came from Japan I had to have it. Yet once I hit that peak none of it meant anything anymore. So, one bitter day I purposely formatted away that eight year otaku binge.

“Why?”

Well, for a while afterwards I wondered about the reasons why it all stopped turning me on. Yet for the most part I realized I never gave myself a reason as to exactly why I enjoyed the stuff in the first place. I consumed it without conscience.

I still remained a somewhat studious fan afterwards and followed along the wave of the culture tide. I went back on and off the wagon like every recovering addict. I went back just to taste, but the potency just wasn’t as strong as I remember–as I thought it should be. Something must have been wrong with me, clearly. Or maybe not. Perhaps it wasn’t me at all and that it was anime with the problem. Maybe anime just stopped being as good as it use to be? It was too crazy to think.

The times kept changing; Anime-Turn Pike got sold off, Ex.org closed, fanfiction.net became just noise, and Mixx changed to Tokyopop then soon after ceased publication. I remember hearing once about the slow death of the anime industry  in Japan. Again, it’s been so long I can’t recall who said it, but there was claim that anime, becoming too expensive to produce in light of a declining economy, was on the verge of collapsing. At the time I thought that was absurd. Its mainstream popularity in the states was growing day by day. How could it be dying?

“And it didn’t die . . . didn’t it?”

It was during that abstaining period when I remember that article, then things made sense suddenly. Anime had died and I watched it happen.

Having been use to the good stuff–the stuff that built anime into the style it’s defined by–I couldn’t handle anything less. It wasn’t that single show that clean put me off, it was the gradual dissension of quality over time; the quality of animation, of art, of acting, of story, of substance and meaning. All of these degraded, ever so slowly, until it was too late for anyone to distinguish between stellar and crap.

How could this happen? That’s another story for another time, but take note! There are instances when a show really stands out from the crowd. Ones that push the boundaries in all areas. When something like that comes along take notice because that’s what turned us all on in the first place. A great show reminds us why anime really is in a class all its own.

But don’t try convincing yourself that something is good because of a played gimmick or thinking the show will be better once it picks up. When will that “pick up” be?

In the 3rd episode?

The 7th episode?

13th episode?

Second season?

But why should you even? Because I believe your time is too precious to spend waiting for that metaphorical handjob. Become critical in what you watch, and watch for the sake of knowing that it’s good, not just because it “fills the requirement.”

You know when something is bad and you should put trust in your instincts. And if you still are hesitant, then take a note from someone more badass than I am and “don’t believe in yourself! Believe in me, who believes in you!”

The sheer amount of anime fans that self identify as otaku and wear it as a badge of pride is mind boggling. Correct me if I’m wrong now, but being an otaku is not and never has been a good thing. It is technically the convenient end all term for any persons whose interests include anime, manga, games, visual novels, figures and Japanese idols, but no one in their right mind should ever pridefully say they are otaku.

In fact if you are proud of being an otaku, you should feel great shame because you have just identified with the lowest common denominator, the bottom feeders, of Japanese society. While not all aspects of otaku hobbies are bad, the plethora of negative labels come with the territory. When I hear the word “otaku”, the first thing that comes to mind of is the stereotypical obsessive, argumentative, delusional, shower aversive pervert that has an unhealthy relationship with a dakimakura of their favorite anime character. Even if you don’t fit the above labels, that’s what an ordinary person probably thinks of you because the reputation surrounding otaku is not positive to say the least.

Let’s take the words “nerd” and “geek” now. While the two are synonymous with social outcasts that are stereotypically clumsy, socially awkward and an obsession with anything remotely related to Star Trek and/or elves, the terms do at least convey positive traits about them such as intelligence in educational subjects and electronics. Otaku… Not so much. That’s not to say that there aren’t smart otaku, but I generally place the group in the lowest rung of social outcasts. In other words there’s no upside to being an otaku. There’s nothing wrong with anime itself or anything of that sort though. I actually love anime more than I ever have, but my rant/argument is that people that aren’t otaku shouldn’t call themselves such. Otaku =/= cool. So next time you think about calling yourself an otaku, don’t say “otaku”.

PS: Don’t say “fujoshi” either.

PSS.: Yes, the post title is a play on Don’t say “lazy”.

In this post, nostalgic memories of the Indigo League and the anime’s steady decline thereafter. Time to nerd it up a notch!

Note: I will use the English dub names for convenience. If you want to be a weaboo about it, just pretend I’m saying the Japanese names instead.

An overdue admission, I’ve long been a closet fan of the Pokemon franchise ever since the release of the original Gameboy games and the subsequent anime hit syndication. Even though the first generation was released well over a decade ago, I remember it like it was yesterday. Catching Pikachu for the first time back in Viridian Forest, foiling Team Rocket’s plans at every step along the way, and finally becoming the league champion after knocking your smug rival (Gary) off his high horse. Good memories.

Likewise, the anime that accompanied the games was, dare I say, pretty damn good. It might be nostalgia speaking, but nearly every episode of the ‘original season’ that covered Ash’s journey through the Indigo League along with Pikachu, Brock, Misty, and Team Rocket was pretty damn good. Yes, even the massive amounts of filler that outweighed the story episodes by a fair margin and resulted in more one-episode characters than I care to count were fun to watch. It was just fun to follow Ash and company on his journey be it fighting gym leaders, battling Team Rocket (back when they were halfway competent), helping an episodic character with a problem, or dealing with a recurring Jigglypuff that just couldn’t take a hint. I really, truly can’t think of anything bad to say about the original series because it was good with plenty of action, drama and comdy. I might be exaggerating a bit, but I stand by my word that the first season was good all around.

Eventually Pokemon lost its way along the line somewhere along the line. The quality of the show as a whole dipped in the ‘second season’ in the Orange Islands arc with the arrival of newcomer Tracy temporarily replacing Brock to shake up the roster. While The Orange Islands was a significant dip, it was still watchable. If I had to place my finger on when the show became crap, it had to definitely be somewhere near the beginning of Johto, going through all of Johto and Advanced Generation (Hoenn) and spanning a time period of six years from 2000-2006. During this time period rampant, boring filler was the norm, Team Rocket gradually became nothing more than a running gag, and even the once vaunted gym and league conference battles lost their glory. Quite frankly, the anime was crap. While its purpose was always, first and foremost, to entertain children, it wasn’t very good but apparently did well enough to keep chugging along.

For the most part, Johto and Hoenn were unwatchable to me. Maybe part of the reason was growing up, but I did catch episodes here and there to see if it was still crap — And it was. The point was the show had lost its magic though. What made the first season so fun was sorely missing from the newer seasons. Post-Indigo League, the show degenerated into a cycle of repetition, mostly involving Team Rocket trying to kidnap Pikachu with lame scheme after lame scheme. I continued to play the games through this time period while mostly avoiding the anime.

When Diamond and Pearl were announced, I decided to give the anime another shot while going through the accompanying game. Surprise, surprise. The Diamond and Pearl anime was actually halfway decent. It was still nowhere near the first season, but at least it became fun to watch again. Some semblance of drama returned to the show with the introduction of a badass new rival, Paul, whose views and morals totally clashed with Ash’s. The point of a rival is to be a total prick, and Paul has the part down pat. The new baddies of the show, Team Galactic, have actually made their presence felt as well. It’s refreshing to have competent villains back in the show. A good villain is something you take for granted when you have nothing but Team Rocket to deal with for years on end. Yeah, Team Rocket is still around, but their antics are more bearable. D/P does have some excruciating filler, but as a whole is a drastic improvement from the previous years of crap. It must be doing something right though, because I do make time to watch it at least.

Bonus round. I think the Pokemon anime as a whole could stand to benefit from a complete reboot by following its manga adaptation, Pokemon Special. It’s friggin’ awesome with a much darker and violent story that more closely follows the games. Pikachu blowing Brock’s Onix to bits and Charmeleon slicing Arbok in half FTW. Best of all, there are more protagonists than just Ash. Seriously, the series needs a new protagonist every now and then to stay fresh. If you think Pokemon is too kiddy, go try the manga. You could easily find scanlations at one of those manga sites out there.

Well, that’s enough nerding out for one day. I don’t know why, but I just wanted to talk about Pokemon for some reason. It was fun to reminisce. Now that I got that off my chest, I’ll return to talking about moe moe girls and the usual stuff, whatever that may be.

In reference to the post title, I’ll kick things off by talking about this season’s premiere historical action show, Sengoku Basara. When I saw the first OP PV, I initially wrote it off on the notion that 90% of game-to-anime adaptations suck donkey balls, especially shows based on action games. For some reason I gave the first episode a shot anyway, and it blew me away. It was good. Damn good in fact.

It’s pretty safe to say that Sengoku Basara (the game) is pretty much a clone of Koei’s long standing Dynasty Warriors (Shin Sangokomuso) franchise with the “take control of a general and beat people up on a battlefield” premise. Seeing how well executed Sengoku Basara (the anime) has been so far, a crazy thought crossed my mind. What if they did this with Dynasty Warriors?

Japan loves Romance of the Three Kingdoms almost as much as China does, as evidenced by the plethora of manga, anime and games devoted to it. Some adaptations of the story have been more faithful than others such as the long forgotten RoTK anime from the early 90′s… And then there’s that shouen-ai crap from a couple years ago that we will never, ever discuss under threat of death from Noirsword.

On the other side of the spectrum there are renditions that aim for sex appeal with gender bent casts and loads of fanservice. Yeah, you know what I’m talking about — Ikkitousen and Koihime Musou. Those two shows just really weirded me out. lulz at the hot female Guan Yu gals with giant boobs that fanboys frantically fap to though.

I suppose the common link between all the shows so far is that they sucked. There hasn’t been a great RoTK anime to date. Now there have been rumblings of a new RoTK anime slated for later this year, but news has been sparse at best. While I’m excited about it, the fan base pretty much consists solely of hardcore RoTK nuts. On the other hand, a Dynasty Warriors anime would be much more exciting and appeal to a greater fan base. Like Sengoku Basara, Dynasty Warriors would heavy liberties with the story and characters, but it does make for a more entertaining show. I guess crazy displays of power, bodies flying everywhere, and overly flamboyant characters have a way of making history more interesting. I can just imagine all the epic LU BU moments right now.

A brief list of things that would make a DW anime great:

-Epic Lu Bu appearances.
-Soldiers screaming, “It’s LU BU!” and pissing their pants.
-Corny lines from the games like “I’ve defeated an officer!”
-Crazy costumes.
-Obligatory Lolis for the pedos.
-Ma Chao doing crazy horse stunts ala Takeda Shingen.
-Guan Yu being an all around prick.
-Tsundere Sun Shang Xiang.
-Strategists (especially Zhuge Liang) saying “Keikaku Doori”.
-Cao Cao as DW’s Nobunaga (complete with Wakamoto voice).
-Zhao Yun as DW’s Yukimura. OYAKATA-SAMA.
-Gan Ning as DW’s Masamune with lots of catchy Engrish phrases.

Dynasty Warriors anime. 52 episodes. It’s not going to happen, but I can wish. Now I’ll end this with some fanservice for sitting through my rambling.